I praise God for Ronnie Coleman

This morning when I woke up, both of my sisters were awake. This is definitely not normal at 6 am. Nicole was like hey come here, i had to start my med first. When I got in there she gave me the news. Uncle Ronnie had died last night.

Im not even sure what my first thought is. I just know that I praise God that now he is no longer in pain. And he is with his best friend, his father, his savior, his Jesus.

Uncle Ronnie was the one of the most amazing Christians I have ever met. This man is so on fire for the Lord. I could never fathom how much he loved Jesus. Everything he did was did for God. Of course he wasnt perfect but he tried to live like Jesus, and got pretty darn close to it.

He was an amazing friend. He was always willing to help out a fellow church goer or anyone that needed help. He lent us his house one time when we were homeless, He has given up his time to help so many people its impossible to list all of it.

Uncle Ronnie was an amazing father, and grandfather. He raised the some of best Christian men, and one of the best Christian female around. His children loved him. He loved them! HE would have done anything to help them out.

He had the best wife. Wherever he faulted, she would be the one to pull through. They were the perfect team! You could tell that they loved each other so much. I hope when I get married, our love is like theirs. They are amazing together!

My Uncle Ronnie touched so many lives. Its hard to see my life without him. I wish I could have been able to give him one last hug, one last kiss, to hear him say that he loved me and was praying for me one last time. But I am praising God for the image of him that I do have. Happy, healthy, and praising his Holy Father! And he wouldn't want it any other way.

I love you so much Uncle Ronnie! I know that you are in heaven looking down on us and praising God with everything that is in you!

You are finally cancer free, and will now wait for the rest of us to come and join you so that once again, we can worship together!

I will always miss you!!

Captivating.

So every Thursday we have been having a bible study at my house. We have been reading the book, Captivating. Nicole had been pestering me for weeks to read this book and about how it would help me and blah blah blah. AT the time that was what I was thinking.

Ever since I got out of the hospital, my thoughts have been different. For some reason, I feel like Ive grown up a little. I think that God used the AFB to help me see what I've been doing wrong in my life. Well, just things that aren't safe or really Godly.

Since starting to read this book a lot of other things have also been brought to my attention. In chapter three of this book, it says

"Fallen Eve controls her relationships. She refuses to be vulnerable. And if she cannot secure her relationships, then she kills her heart's longing for intimacy so that she will be safe and in control. She becomes a woman 'who doesn't need anyone- especially a man.' How this plays out over the course of her life, and how the wounds of her childhood shape her heart's convictions are often a complex story, on worth knowing. But beneath it all, behind it all, is a simple truth: women dominate and control because they fear their vulnerability. Far from God and far from Eden, it seems a perfectly reasonable way to live. But consider also this: 'Whatever is not from faith is sin' (Rom. 14:23 NKJV). That self-protective way of relating to others has nothing to do with real loving, and nothing to do with deeply trusting God. It is our gut-level response to a dangerous world."

This paragraph really stood out to me for some reason. I still cant really pin point why it would stand out to me. I know I like to be in control. I've always been "Miss Independent". I used to say that if there was a way that I could reproduce without a man, I would. Because I felt that I didn't need one. I could run and control my own life.

I applied this thought to my relationship with God. I didn't need him. He was just a big heavenly being that created us all and killed of his son for us messed up people. Why did I have to rely and need a guy like that?

Through reading this book, I've come to see that I do need God. I cant run my life on my own. Sure i'm not perfect at this...I mean...I definitely still want control...but I think that slowly and surely (over the last couple of weeks) I've been trying to give God the reigns.

This morning as I was walking to my class, I had...I guess you could say a revelation. It was such a beautiful morning. I mean...mountain gorgeous! the leaves were perfect color and the sky was just amazing! A couple of things popped in my mind as I was trying to pray.

1) "And I stand, in awe...of you!!! Jesus, and I stand in awe in awe of you! That song popped in my head...I mean...i Was just in awe at the scenery around me.

2) God is beautiful. He creates/created beautiful creations. And which in turn...means that I am beautiful.

I almost started crying right there. I do believe that I accepted what Captivating has been trying to teach us. That I am beautiful because God is beautiful, and I am created in his image! HOw awesome is that?!

I've been trying for a long time to accept this. I do believe that my heart has accepted it...I just need to keep reminding myself it so I don't forget!

I am beautiful! and God loves me...more than I'll ever know!

dont know how to retitle this.

i dont even know what to say right now.

So i thought that i was doing a good job of taking care of myself, going to all my classes, working hard at my job, being responsible. but no. I obviously wasnt. so here is what has happened in the past week.

saturday night i went to kristens bday party. hung out with all of my friends, and made new ones. sunday, went to church, then went back to kristens for her birthday. i brought her lunch. i was udner the impression that i was going to dinner with my parents. but no. so that was obviously mistake number 1.

monday(tuesday) comes along. mom texts me earlier in the day and says lets get together. im all for it. i never hear from her again. so im at home alone and decide i want to do something. so i contact my friends. mistake #2. miniature golfing is bad.

wednesday. I had the biker girl church "bible study" after that, I went to hooters with friends. Marcel, Brian, Kristen, Ramon, and Junious. Mistake #3

Friday. I went to a club. i danced dirty. i didnt get home until fucking 430. had the time of my life. enjoyed hanging out with my friends. though most of them were drunk. it was still awesome. they made my 18th birthday great.

saturday. who knows what i did.

sunday (today) went to church. did homework. went to papas wedding. then went to buffalo wild wings with marcel, enrique, ramon, big scott, maggie. this was obviously awful. mistake # 893027502973529035879023849320.

was (i guess) supposed to meet with della and mason at bww...didnt know this.

go home about 8. get home. chill with the sisters. then get ready for bed.

doing my treatments. and nicole comes in and gets on me about my "activities"

1030 comes around, and low and behold here comes the mother and stepfather. all big and bad in their bicker outfits. demanding to talk with me. so I go. and know that im in trouble. though i havent done anything.

they start lecturing me about my decions. and how i have been lying to them. which is not the truth. i have told them everything that i was doing. which they said that was a lie. and that i have been deceitful and twisting m y words around and manipulating everyone. i have smoked 5 cigarettes since saturday. i have slept with marcel, ramon, and big scott (not true...just according to my parents) and i have been hiding things from them.

aint this just fucking great. here i was thinking i was doing ok, and whoops!! silly me!! should have known that since you aint exactly like them and nicole that it was wrong.

they said that my friends aint true friends because they took me to these places. club, bar hooters, that are all "filled" with smoke.

I used to be the girl that hated when people smoked around her. i still dont like it. but i like to hang out with my friends and some of them smoke. its a free country. if they want to they can. but according to my parents this is all out of character of me. well mother if you didnt have your head stuck up some muffler you would see that i have become this person. there are other things in life besides motorcycles. but you guys dont even notice me unless im not conforming with your perfect little plans.

and because they dont know my friends it means that i have been hiding them from them. which is horrible. because they have to know everything about my life. they have to know my every move. so you know what mom. im going to text you whenever i do something. you are going to know when i do anything, from going to class to taking a shit. i dont give a fuck anymore.

according to phil, a child is not supposed to have secrets from their parents until abou t10-15 years after they move out of the house. what kind of shit is that?!?! i mean...they have never known everything about me. i hide tons of shit from them. there is so much stuff that no one knows about me. well kristen knows it all.

so i wish i was never born. im such a failure to my parents that i dont see any reason why i should live . i mean, i obviously cant please them. and i cant please anyone in my family. my life sucks ass anyway.

they seriously think that me being friends with the people i am now, is hazardous to my health. everything is hazardous to my health. and i am not della. i did not go on a drinking binge. i have been offered alcohol so many times in the past week...and has one oz touched my lips?? hell no. sure, i went to a couple of places that were loaded with smoke., my bad. would my doctors approve?? no. but i bet they also wouldnt approve of me not trying to live my life.

this sucks. i cant stop crying. like, i cant even put into words how much i am hurting right now.

and all this shit about God. he doesnt care about me. never has never will. there i said it mom! he doesnt care!! how do you even know he exists?!?! he aint never done anything in my life to prove it, and ive tried to talk to him. ive poured my heart out so many times to him. and no response. i dont know what ive done to him but he fuckin hates my guts.

i hate this. i hate feeling like this. you want me to be myself phil?!?! no masks?!?!? well you should see me when im with all my friends, that is when im truly myself, that is when im the happiest. but wait, i forgot. you did say that you were going to come the next time i went out with my friends. o wait i forgot that was mom.

doesnt anyone ever respect privacy anymore?!?!?!?!?

i dont know why i don tstand up to them. it is so much easier to just let them talk shit and make them happy then to stand up to myself.

i don teven know what to say anymore.

i could use a hug right now. or just any sort of physical contact with a human being.

i hate this. i hate this. i hate this.

i dont know what to do. the smart thing would be to chuck all of my friends and be a lonely loser like nicole. a person that never leaves the house. that would make my parents happy. but yet, i cant ever do anything to please them so whats the fuckin point?!?!?

yeah i know...potty mouth...

i love you kristen. thank you so much for semi understanding. i know my text messages scare dthe shit out of you.

well i think this is about it.

if you have any advice...i would love it.

peace.

What is the big deal...when no one seems to notice the change??

Doesn't seem odd how every decision we make, had different consequences?? I mean, when you are thinking about your choices, does everyone picture the many different things that could happen?? I try not too...it freaks me out...and drives me crazy!! How is a person supposed to make any decisions with all that pressure being thursted upon their shoulders!! I mean, its bound to make a person falter...thats what I feel like. That I've been faltering. All my life it seems like ive had this presssure to please my parents and everyone around me. The choices that either I made or my mom made for me when I was little has shaped me to be who I am today. But is it the person I want to be?? Sometimes, I feel like such a hypocrit. Am I really the person that I portray myself to be?? IF I am, how come when its just me, I feel like a piece of flesh that God wasted his time on. Just taking up air and space. But sometimes, I feel like maybe, just maybe I have a purpose in this world. So what is the big deal?? Right now, the things that used to freak me out (college, sex, moving out) don't hold quite as much power over me as they used to. Sure I'm still scared of all of the above, but i've already taken two big steps. Im going to college and I've moved out. Though, sometimes it doesnt feel like it. So i was watching this movie on lifetime this evening called, Accepted. Its about these seniors in high school whose parents put so much pressure on them to get accepted into the college of the parents choice that they warp the childrens minds. Looking back on my senior year, my mom at first pushed me to get my applications in. Then once I got accepted into my school of choice, it was like college didn't exsist anymore. I guess I had this dream that me and her would sit down and look at scholarships and she would help me and remind me if I forgot and things like that. But once I got accepted, she went back to the old ruetine of forgetting that I exsisted. At least that is what it felt like. ANd this past week, i feel like she doesn't even care that I have moved out of her house. I mean she didn't even help me move out. When nicole went to college she cried her eyes out. Am I not as important?? HAve I not made you proud mom?? I have tried my best to accomplish all that you wanted me too...sure Im not perfect...and I know ive let you down...but have I ever made you proud?? Have my decisions about school and work pleased you?? I wish that you could be here holding me and helping me move into my room, sure its not at some fancy college, but it is out of your house. Your baby has left the nest and it seems like you didn't even notice. Why cant you just hold me while i cry?? Im scared to grow up!! Im scared to live away from you!! Im scared to go to college and work!!! Im scared that Im not going to live my life...im scared that im not going to make you proud...im scared of so many things. And yet, I cant talk to you about any of this. Because you will start preaching at me...and that is not what I want, and it is not what i need. Have you ever noticed when Im hurt or when im in pain?? You have always seemed to be preoccupied with something else, probably since the day I was born. I feel like i've never been important to you. I guess you could say that im just being childish...immamature...ungrateful...selfish...but throughout all of these feelings...my main thoughts are on you...have I ever hurt you with my decisions?? Have I ever disappointed you?? Why is it that Im always so worried about pleasing you that I forget about me? Should I renounce who I am and just live my life to please you?? Will that finally make you accept me, love me?? Or will it just remind you that you have 2 other daughters that you have to focus on? Nicole says that I shouldn't take it too personally...but how can I not?? I feel like ive always been pushed on the backburner and no one notices me! I just want to be noticed...I want to feel loved...appreciated...like im doing something worth while. I want to please God, my parents, my family my friends...my bosses my coworkers...but can I really please all of them? I try so hard...i feel like a failure...i always feel like a failure...and no one has ever told me that im not. Why does it seem like my life is centered on pleasing people?? I dont understand. I just want to be me!!! I just want to be noticed as the girl who is strong, but weak. The girl who all of her friends say she is pretty...but never feels it...wouldn't mind someone (random boys would be nice, or a certain one) to help her understand that she is pretty. I dont want to be another copy!! I want to stand out...to be noticed...to be remembered!! Will anyone remember me in 10 years?? Will my high school friends remember me?? Will my family?? Or willl I just fade from peoples minds?? To me that is the most depressing thought of all. I havent been able to get just one freakin boy out of my head since the first day i met him...but yet...he probably barely even recognizes my exsistence... i just need prayer...maybe these feelings come from the facct that i am growing up and it scares me...or i just may be finally losing my mind. Or i could be really tired...and pmsing...though its a week early...which would follow kristens lol like normal...but i guess yall didnt want to know all that...

I just want to feel special...loved...wanted...needed...accepted. Can you all do that for me??

September 11, 2001

Does anyone remember those movies?? The Two Towers and United 93, the ones about the events that happened on 9/11. Up unil today...i have never been able to watch them...i was scared i guess... So i came home exhausted and when i get that way i get weepy...so i wanted to watch a sad movie so i would cry...i guess i picked the right one...the damn thing hadnt even started yet and i was already crying. I remember that day. I was in 5th grade, Longhill elementary...it was my friends bday...almost my bday...was looking forward to turning...what...11?? At my school they didnt turn on the tvs like other schools...they kept everything as normal as possible, the only weird thing was that kids were getting checked out left and right all of a sudden. When i finally heard the news, i remember being frightened, my brother was in the reserves at the time...i knew he was going to have to fight...and i was scared that they would call my mom back into the military ( though that was a foolish thought...but i was little lol ). I never knew how much of an impact that would have on me. I mean look at me now..my best friends brother died because of it, her dad is currently in iraq because of it. My brother in law, and the kid that im dating will be deploying in august because of that God forsaken day. What is wrong with people anyway that these things cant be settled without fighting?? If Clinton had just killed binladen when he had the chance...this all could have been avoided!


But it did happen...so what now?? 8 years later, i finally get up the courage to watch a movie thats been out for 3 years, and i realized...how often do I tell my boyfriend that im proud of him?? how often does my brother in law know he is being prayed for?? What about all the other military men and women, do they know that the citizens of the United States are still backing them up?? Still supporting them and praying for them?? Do they know that we are proud of each and everyone of them??

I dont believe they do. See America has gotten lazy...this i am not proud of. I think, now that the war is drawing closer to being over with, people think that the troops dont need the encouragement. But they do...they always do. If they didnt have the people back home, what would they fight for? If they didnt feel our support, would they even make it home??

It seems unfair. Why did steven have to die?? so me and kristen could become best friends?? thats a horrible reason, so why did he have to die??

What about mr. ochsner?? Why was he killed??

What about all the other 2,794 people that were killed on 9/11...why did they have to die?? Because some foreign terrosist decided to screw over America??

I fell useless...I want to hurt all the people that hurt my country, my home, my family. But i cant do anything, but right a stupid, and pathetic blog.

I really need to get some sleep...

growing up

so for me...ive always looked forward to growing up. Being financially, physically, and emotionally responsible for everything that i need. But it seems like my parents wont ever let me. Here i am, almost 18 a high school graduate, and my mom doesnt trust me to be on my own. Today was my first day back at work after spending yesterday being responsible and running errands, o and spending some time with my sister and boyfriend. I was hanging out with some friends and she told me that i didnt have a curfew. Welll 10 o clock roles around and she completely changes her mind, i had to be home at 11. And if i didnt finish thank you notes before tomorrow i wouldnt be allowed to do anything at all this weekend. I have been home for two days, yesterday i had to buy thank you notes, and today i spent the day working. I dont understnad why i am forced to do everything right away, nicole and della never did. Well i got the thank you notes done. But it is still aggravating! why do i need a curfew?? ugh...why does she change her mind?? it really makes planning hard...

home at last

So yesterday me and kristen made the long journey home. It was definitely sad. I really didnt want to go! Well we safely made it to all of our flights (barely on one) and made it home with only minor scrapes and bruises .lol Which im just kidding...none of us got hurt...though i did hurt my shoulder but that was from carrying the vest...lol Today, thursday, was a day or remeniscing on our trip, and unpacking/resting. It was a pretty good day i must say! I unpacked, which doesnt usually happen on the first day back, then took a long and very enjoyable shower, it was heaven! Then i played grownup. lol i made a list of all the thank you notes i needed to write and a list of what i need at walmart. FUn stuff!! after this i had a splendid idea...lets have lunch with heather =) so me and my baby sister had lunch...it was enjoyable! Well i didnt want to be alone while i ran all my errands so she came with me, and we spent the rest of the day together =) it was so much fun! and i got to see josh for a little bit =D and that was pretty much my first day home...tomorrow it is back to the real world...got to work...all day long! i am not excited...

Idaho day9= final day =(

Today started out like any other, me and kristen sleeping half the day away. I got up about 10, and was sad. I cant believe that today was our last day!! I really dont want this vacation to end! Throughout these 9 days i not only have gotten closer with my best friend, but have been able to get closer to people that i now really consider my family! I dont know what i would do without grandma, grandpa and mr bob. You three have come to mean so much to me! I really do not want to go home! Well, today all we did was pack. Then grandma took us out to a late lunch, where after that we went shopping, again! Then it was back home to repack and make sure we had all of our crap. Then we took to the couch to read our new books. Grandma was taking a nap because she was coughing like crazy! We started getting ready for out bbq around 6. I helped grandma cook the biscuits and shuck the corn, and of course kristen helpsed ;) lol. WE had a great time hanging with alisha and her parents, they are some really cool people! Dinner in itself was wonderfully yummy! AFter dinner it was chilling in the living room for a little, mainly us trying to stall. We really didnt want to leave. Finally it was time for goodbyes. I really did not want to say goodbye. Going home is great, but i didnt want to, i had found another home here and i wasnt ready to leave!!! I still aint... But alas, it must come to an end. Thank you so much grandma, grandpa, and mr bob for letting me invade on your homes and your lives! I have enjoyed myself so much! I will never forget anything that has happened in the past week. I am eternally grateful for everything and i cant wait to come back!!!

Kristen: Thank you so much for letting me come with you to visit your grandparents! I had so much fun! I know that we got on each others nerves sometimes lol but what are bestfriends for?? I enjoyed hanging out with you , and cant wait to see you at work on friday...actually i lied...i dont want to see you then! lol im just kidding. And hey at least we can say that we came back better friends then we were when we left, instead of enemies like we predicted! i love you so much krissie kinz!!!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

idaho day 7/8

So not much happened on day 7 and day 8. SUnday was day 7, and also fathers day. I got the chance to talk to both of my dads and even my grandpa. It was great. Me and Kris also had the amazing oppurtunity of cooking grandpa breakfast and linner!!! ok not breakfast...he cooked us breakfast, which it was quite an interesting affair since me and kristen insisted on taking showers first and he got tired of it lol. After dinner though we had a good time just hanging out with each other. WE watched M*A*S*H pretty much all day, except for when we watched the Italian Job which is the best movie ever! =) after dinner we made the move back to grandmas house. On the way, kris got sick, we are pretty sure that she is lactose intolerant, and we had extreme cheesecake for desert. But all is well now!

Monday was amazing!! Me and Kris slept till about, 10, then after that we did nothing but stay in our pajamas all day and watch the ocean 11, ocean 12, and ocean 13. in bewteen the first two movies we got hungry and drove to mcdonalds. Still in our pajamas. it was great!! a complete lazy day!!! the rest of the day was spend vegging on the sofa in our pajamas lol amazing!!

Idaho day 6 =)

so not much happened today. We woke up rather late (well like 9:30, 10). and then just waited aroun duntil grandpa came and picked us up =) by that time it was lunch and we had no idea what we wanted to do. We took the 45 minute drive to boise (which still does not seem like 45 minutes to me) and went straight to grandpas house where me and kristen immediately set to work. aka we laid down on the floor and worked on our blogs and updating the pictures from yesterday lol. we didnt know what else to do and we felt it needed to be done. That was when we decided to go to the movies. Somehow we convinced grandpa to take us to see The Proposal. We met up with grandpas girlfriend, ms patti and her oldest daughter sarah. She was a really cool girl =) i decided this when the previews came on for transformers two and she agreed with me when i said (kind of loudly) that shia labouf (sp) was hot!! and she helped me and kristen to gulp down a HUGE tub of popcorn, which i must add the popcorn here is not as tasty as the ones back home... Which reminds me...lol...at the popcorn counter kristen wanted to get candy and she made me choose, well i dont eat alot of candy so i dont care, well we argued for like 2 minute sover it and the dude behond the counter said that we were the most entertaining thing to happen all day. it was funny .lol random i know... well after the movie we went back home and have been vegging ever since =) im going to go to bed now so goodnight =) love you all!!!

Idaho: day 5 : yellowstone/ Tetons

The morning started out great =) When we stopped for gas, grandma was mistaken for our mother it was hilarious!! I was pumping the gas and kris was in the car and grandma was inside. this old dude on a motorcyle was talking to kris about what we were doing today and he mentioned how me and her look just like our mother. It was great!!! The rest of the day was filled with random stops for animal pictures and jokes that made all three of us laugh till we were crying! Later on we saw old faithful, which wasnt as exciting as i thought it was going to be, but it was still really cool!!! As we were driving through the Tetons we saw a female moose right on the side of the road and a grizzly bear that walked across the road, right in frony of tha car it was awesome!!!!! We drove through the "famous" Teton mountains, though i had never heard of them before lol. After the Tetons we had a very long journey home. It was quite long, but we made the best of it. Throughout the ride there were many jokes about grandma being our "mom" and i must say that the funnest part of that trip was seeing the donesticated buffalo, deer, and rams!! aka cows, deers, and sheep. lol we had some laughs about that. O! there was alot of traffic at one point because of consturction, so kristen jumped out of the car and got her laptop out of the trunk, while doing it, she hit her head on the trunk lol it was funny! o and i beat josh's high score on the most addicting game! his was 24.60 and i beat it three times, the most at 30.90 seconds lol it was thrilling!!! well i think thats about all that happened! ill keep you all up to date about the rest of hte vacation love ya!!!

Idaho: Day 4 - Yellowstone

So today we went on the 11 hour journey through yellowstone. We didnt get to see all of it, but we got to see some pretty awesome stuff!! It started out with the first siting of a bald eagle in his nest. It was awesome! The rest of the day was filled with so many neat and awesome things i dont even know where to start explaining them! Well lets see, first i would like to start out with i am tired of sitting in cars. It seems like everywhere we go on this trip it is through a car, like we drive everywhere! it was definitely worth it today though. The morning started out a little rough, but soon got better. THe drive throughout yellowstone was extremely gorgeous. We got to see tons of wildlife. You can tell when wildlife is spotted, everyone pulls over! it can create quite a traffice jam! We saw tons of elk (or deer not sure which), and their babies. They were so cute!!! We also saw tons of bison (buffalo) and their young. I have never seen so many wild animals in my life!! Along with these we saw a grizzly bear, 2 sets of black bears, a coyote, birds, and the cutest ground squireel you will ever see, and i think thats it. Along side the wildlife was the gorgeous scenery. Throughout the day it threatened rain, and did rain a couple of times. Because of this rain we saw the most beautiful and perfect rainbow that i have ever seen! It had all colors that you normally expect to see in a rainbow. It was awesome!!! and the sunset was gorgeous!!!! Even though the ride got a little boring at times, we girls still found ways to make it interesting. From crazy talks int the car, singing the songs when they aint playing, to jumping off rocks for pictures and making faces! It has definitley been one of the best times in my life! The most interesting event of the day was when it snowed! When we entered the park the road was clear, but on our way out the sides of the road were pretty much covered in snow! it is the middle of june!!! It was the weirdest thing ever!!! but also very pretty, it gave the landscap a character that i never would have imagined. Well i think that is pretty much all that happened today, so im going to bed. Love you all =)

Idaho day:3

So today is the third day of our (mine and kristens) trip to idaho! I cant believe that we are finally here!! we have gone through so much to get to this point...lol like high school! I was so looking forwars to this trip! So far it has been amazing! Kristen and I have continued with our normal banter of hating/loving each other...lol it is quite interesting to partake in. We left raleigh at 6:30 monday morning, it felt way to early! The first flight went pretty good, the scenery was gorgeous, we could see the land pretty much the whole time, it was great! Even when the clouds were out the scene was gorgeous! the clouds were so very pretty! We arrived in salt lake city Utah around 9 west time, so i guess 11 nc time. When we got there we just kind of walked around bored and ready to fly. Nothing interesting happened until around the time we were supposed to be boarding. The gate on our ticket wasnt not the gate that we were supposed to be at, and we realized this once we got off the plane, so we went to the one that the airport said. After waiting around for an hour, we realized that the plane should be boarding by now. Well i looked at the screen and they had changed our gate...AGAIN!! we almost missed our flight! it was not good! but we made it just in time. We arrived in Boise around 1150 idaho time, and there was gradnpa! lol we celebrated our safe trip with a lunch at dennys where grandpa left his phone lol then we drove to his house where we collapsed on his o so soft rug. Then we commenced driving to grandmas house in mountain home which is about 45 minutes away. THat was pretty much the end of monday... yesterday we hung out with kristens pregnant friend alisha! She is a really cool girl! i am very glad we got ot hang out. We also saw the movie Ghost of Girlfriends past. It was pretty funny. Totally a chick flick which made me miss that stupid boy i have back home lol. And that brings us to today =) Today we drove all the way across idaho to the yellowstone bear world! it was so cool!!! the landscape on the way was nothing like we have in nc! I was mesmorized by the different type of scenery, i didnt know that the land could be so flat without trees! I couldnt stop taking pictures! After bearworld we drove to our hotel which is in MONTANA!!!!I have now been to two states that i never thought i was going to go to! lol its is so exciting!! well thats about all that we have done so far...ill write more tomorrow! must say though, im pretty exhausted...getting used to these times is not fun! I love you all!!! =D